Do you believe me, do you believe YOU; are you fake or real?


Haters say I should keep my business to myself; haters say I should stop writing about my problems and face them.


I face my problems, dissect them, and fix them.


I write to let others in this world know that you are not alone; that is one of the harshest things to feel; I felt alone for a very long time; and sometimes; I still feel alone; I am one of you; struggling in this hard life.  I write to encourage; my words come from the heart. So for all you lying haters who contribute hate, lies, and division in this world… this is written for you!


I think I have had more life-lesson’s in the past few month’s that have really tested me, but have made me understand a  lot of things I really need to…  The funny thing is that when I think about it in retrospect; when emotions aren’t flying,  no matter who or why/what I am arguing with or about; I always find that it always comes back to one common denominator, TRUST or lack thereof.


I noticed more and more people are not trusting anyone these days; we certainly don’t trust our political system; there are so many innocent people behind bars; and so many walking free because of who they know or what they had to work on their side to keep them out of prison.  We know politics is a lie; and it is almost expected to hear about all the lies.


The media~ is one huge LIE, television tells young girls how they are “supposed” to look, dress, and behave in all the ways that are against self acceptance; it is all about creating a woman who doesn’t naturally exist.


We can’t even trust our own government,  think about the percentage of people who are waiting on social security to help them survive; even though it has been months, years, and they are disabled but they have to hire a lawyer and wait years to prove the truth.

We are so busy getting 2nd and 3rd opinions because we know we can’t put trust in our doctors~we don’t trust our insurance companies, there are so many in the healthcare field who have one purpose they are where they are; and it has to do with GREED alone.

How many of us have lost faith in the company who employs/employed us?  What many considered a sanctuary, the place to go to restore their faith, they have cut ties with… the church.  Social media holds the newest list of liars~WE have fake followers on Twitter, Fake profiles on Facebook, and LinkedIn has spam filled fake professionals and jobs.


The trust issues run so deep they continue on to include those people we deal with on a regular basis, teachers, friends, neighbors,  co-workers, bosses, landlords, family members, and even our own spouses; and the biggest greatest disappointment, is that more and more people have lost trust in God.


We hold many relationships in our daily lives; and think about all the different ones you hold; we can see truly that “Relationships” can be very fake; especially those at places of employment where people brown-nose for one reason.


I think I would rather be alone than have any relationships that are fake;


people who act like they care can destroy; and people who take up valuable time with lies don’t deserve to be around those who are working on practicing honesty; they usually have motives.


I have never been one to act like I like someone if for some reason I don’t like them; which is very rare; and they have to be the cruelest soul in the world; I have a huge heart and forgive people very easily; I give people more chances than they deserve; but once they show me; they can’t be trusted; I will NEVER let them in again.


I guess, that proves I do in fact hold some distrust myself.  I believe people can change and if they want to,  I know it is possible; but the truth is people are the way they are; and can only put on an act for so long.


I am very accepting; I can tolerate more people than others would; in fact I will even forget at times they have a bad side; until it happens again; and then I look like a fool yet again.  I am very selective with who I allow into my circle; I love to help all; but when it comes to me allowing you in my personal space; you have to be pretty honest, loyal; and understanding; but you will get the same from me.

I do have to say there are times I feel like a huge hypocrite; that is those times; when someone shows me they can’t be trusted; by keeping lies from me I know all about; and I pretend to not know; I continue to allow them to “be my friend”; and let them believe there is nothing wrong; because I am on a “testing-friend trial ,” this is usually in the beginning of when I figure them out; I usually give them “time” to come clean to me; I will even be nice enough to hint around that I may have a clue.  Sometimes people need coaxing to admit the truth because of fear; but if nothing; they lose all my respect and will never be in my space again.


I know telling the truth is really hard at times; and even admitting the truth to ourselves can be difficult.  I always find it interesting when I am bothered by something and after self evaluation I realize I am really bothered by something else; how can I lie to myself; that has to be the ultimate betrayal especially for someone who takes pride in their honesty.  I know it is very important to people to feel trusted; especially those who feel they deserve it.  I remember when I was younger; feeling and receiving that deep trust from my family or some teachers; and I would go out of my way to not lose their trust; because I didn’t get it from everyone and that really angered me.  I may have made a lot of bad decisions, been pretty spontaneous, class clown, in trouble more than my parents would like to remember; I may have gotten the class distracted, been wild in my ways but one thing I wasn’t was a liar.

The funny thing is, when you think about trust; there is the action/word alignment basis…. it really doesn’t always add up or make sense.  For instance; my website and my Facebook concentrates on  Permanent Expressions; I try to live my life as positive and self-propelling as possible; but that doesn’t mean I am not going to have those seasons when I am totally down.  I may wake one day and have a very spiritual day; close and comfortable all day date with Jesus.  I wake the next day; I find myself spending most of the day with Future, and Lil Wayne… I live in this world; I am present in it; but I always find my spiritual soul back to Jesus arms; that doesn’t make me a liar, it makes me honest to who I am and what I feel at ALL times.

Trust is a skill and way of operating that involves decisions, judgments, and risks. Trust doesn’t happen like an on-off switch. It’s something you create and nurture.  Building and sustaining trust is an ongoing process.

As children, we learn to trust and be trusted; it is very important to practice this with our children by keeping our word; and trusting them.  Children lie because it is easier to lie; you get what you want; you get out of trouble; but it is a decision that can be changed.  So it is not true once a liar always a liar.


Sometimes, telling the truth is hard; it has high risk; if someone takes the risk to tell you the truth; they think you are worth the truth; give them a break; they deserve it. If you don’t trust someone you want to; and they want to be trustworthy; work on it; it is totally worth it.  I have known people in my life; who will tell me the truth no matter how much it hurts, and how terrible it makes them feel; because of these people I know that those are the ONLY people who really have my back because if they know I am worth the truth even over their own comfort; that shows how selflessly they love~ that is the person I want to be back to them.


Guess what, when you practice being trustworthy; you get super brave and courageous; you believe people more and you know that trust is true and alive; because it lives in YOU.


For all those I can trust, SING MY SONG IT’S ALL FOR YOU

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